This Child That You Delivered

Did you know that your Baby Boy has come to make you new?

This Child that you delivered will soon deliver you.

From my body and my womb, I delivered you.  Through labor, you entered my world, bursting with life, grasping with tightened fists and demanding to be held and to be fed.  Through labor you were delivered to my heart to hold and to love. Your vision was clouded and your perception was short-sighted.  As a stranger you were abruptly thrust into this new world.   Dependent and desperate, knowing not the language nor being able to act alone, you asked for love the only way you knew how and you returned love the only way you knew how.  Your needs were immediate and sharply defined.  Your affections and allegiances were not wasted on the shallow but on the ones who met your needs.

As time wore on in the weeks ahead, my body and my womb healed.  Your vision cleared.  Your strength grew.  Your developing perception and abilities were simple pleasures to behold each day.  Time disappeared as I sat with you each day, observing what you observed and delighting with you and your discoveries and your growth.  Your language skills evolved and your personality quickly became sharply defined.  Your need of me changed as well, but you still needed me.  As time wore on in the weeks ahead, my heart expanded with the growth of my son.  You became my saving grace; you brought new life to me.

Time continued to disappear into the future as I watched you.  A young adult you became with a sharply defined personality.  Your affections and allegiances changed as you learned to reach out, not only in need but also in abundance.  Your mission and your calling expanded your heart while mine contracted.  Watching you turn into a man of strength, of purpose, of grace became a reminder that my saving grace would some day be walking toward the unknown horizons of the world.  Through labor you were delivered to my heart to hold and to love; now bursting with your own life, standing with tightened fists, you are demanding to be set free and to be respected as your own.

When I delivered you that fateful day, how was I to know you would one day be delivering me? You became my saving grace; you brought new life to me.   Like swaddling clothes around a newborn, my life has been wrapped around you.  Within a safe cocoon I have existed.  My personality became sharply defined by your baby blankets, your toddler toys, your classmates and teammates, the ups and downs of your social life and the planning of your future.  I’ve saved for your college days; I’ve scoped out the site for the perfect apartment.

Now my baby boy wants to be his own man.  With a vision of your own, your perceptions have sharpened and your mission is beyond my world.  Now the real me has no one to hide within and now I am the stranger abruptly thrust into this new world. Dependent and desperate, knowing not the language nor being able to function alone, I ask for love the only way I know how.  Yes, my body and my womb healed after the delivery of you but the labor of my heart continues.

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