Dark Night for a Mother

On the day that she gave birth, part of her heart was rent from her and settled into her young son.  She nurtured, she fed and she diapered him in those early months of life.  When he grew in strength, she helped him to step into a world that was much more interesting than he had known and far more dangerous.  In protective mode, she stayed two steps ahead, making sure that this bouncing and ebullient toddler was safe and secure.  The hopes and dreams for her little man abounded with no limits.  Her heart beat strong, in his body and hers.

If only childhood would last forever!  Now today and every day forever more, her heart beats toward a sure and slow death.  The birthdays, the Mother’s Days, the holidays–all festive days of celebration–will only serve to remind her of her failure as a mother.  The pain of reality crushes and smothers.  If only death would come soon!  The shame and the guilt robs of all joy and hope.  Questions haunt day and night.  Answers rarely come but when they do, new waves of despair wash over her.  Understanding is far removed, as far as the desert from the sea.  The Dark Knight moved in like a thief, taking lives and twisting others from behind a mask of altered persona.  He once was the baby that suckled at her breast.  He once was the little boy who ran to her in tears with a scraped knee.  He once was a young man, brilliant beyond most.  Now he is a young man, behind bars and out of reach.

On the day that she answered the phone, her heart was rent from her as she heard the news of her young son.  She had nurtured, she had fed and she had diapered him in those early months of life.  When he grew in strength, she helped him to step into a world that was much more interesting than he had known and far more dangerous.  In protective mode, she stayed two steps ahead, making sure that this bouncing and ebullient toddler was safe and secure.  The hopes and dreams for her little man abounded with no limits.  Now her heart begs to fail, for those hopes and dreams lay scattered about like spent shells after a massacre and her son is now a dead man walking.  The mother has now been thrust into booby-trapped life which she did not choose.  The mother now serves a life sentence of constant death.

Joy will not come in the morning, for the Dark Knight rises again and again with the dawning of each new day.  Until she tastes death, there will be no escape from the prison of pain, shame and guilt that is now her world.

Birth Mother: Official Trailer

Photo courtesy of article.wn.com

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4 thoughts on “Dark Night for a Mother

  1. Applicable personally and nationally.I have a friend whose son accidentally killed his father while on drugs. He is now out of prison, walking with the Lord and restored to his mother and siblings. Joy is possible with Jesus.

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    • “Joy is possible with Jesus”–and when He is denied, so is joy. A family torn apart. without restoration, marches full speed down a crazy-making pathway, does it not?

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